


Recombined

by MidnightsWaltz



Category: Mass Effect: Andromeda
Genre: DOES THIS COUNT AS FLUFF, Established Relationship, F/M, There's a baby, a human baby, and a brief discussion of dead beat parents, but not Alec for a change, minor male Ryder/Reyes Vidal, probably needs more fluff, there's a brief mention of a past discussion of abortion
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2021-01-27
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:49:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27030718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MidnightsWaltz/pseuds/MidnightsWaltz
Summary: Evelyn Ryder has one last secret to reveal
Relationships: Jaal Ama Darav/Female Ryder | Sara
Comments: 15
Kudos: 94





	1. Jaal

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Baby Ryder](https://archiveofourown.org/works/24684400) by [ShadowCr0w](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShadowCr0w/pseuds/ShadowCr0w). 



> Rated M mostly for cussing.
> 
> This is not beta'd - unless you count me reading and rereading and fiddling with it about 6000 times. If you notice any typos a head-up would be appreciated. 
> 
> The word _jinesh_ is from the [ Angaran Expansion Project](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1458790) by MyrddinDerwydd (their [Tumblr](https://angaranexpansionproject.tumblr.com/) is also completely brilliant).
> 
> Other Angaran vocab is canon in-game vocab, though there are a couple names that I made up.
> 
> Sam's definition of 'babyproof' is directly from the Merriam-Webster Dictionary.

"I don't care about whose DNA has recombined with whose. When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching--they are your family."  
― Jim Butcher, Proven Guilty

* * *

Evelyn Ryder shivered as she stood in front of a door to one of the cryo bays.

Cryo bays were always cold. Probably a side effect of the coolant running through the walls keeping the sleepers in stasis. It had never bothered Ryder before, she always preferred things on the chillier side, but her shivering wasn't from the cold.

The bay she stood in front of was smaller than the others and situated deep inside the Hyperion. Even this cryo bay still carried blaster and grenade scars from the Kett invasion. Four men and women died at the door successfully keeping the Kett away from the sleepers inside. It was how narrowly a tragedy had been averted that chilled Ryder to her bones.

The Kett, not understanding why this specific cryo bay was so important, had other focuses and had moved on that day. That had been thirty-seven days ago. Twenty times, Ryder had hovered by this door since then, absolutely dying to go in. Just to make sure with her own eyes that everyone was all right. That was at least once a day every day they were on Meridian. She wasn't sure how many assurances she would need to actually feel like everything was safe.

The door open and Harry stepped out, his head in a datapad.

"Hey, Harry," Ryder said. There was a buzzing along her nerves as she fought to keep her tone nonchalant.

Harry jumped. "Oh, hey, Ev. I almost thought you wouldn't be here today." He chuckled to himself. "I guess, I should know you better than that."

"Yes, you should," she said. "Well?"

"She's fine. All of them are. I promised you I wasn't going to let us lose another Ryder and I'm standing by that."

"What about mom? I mean, how is she?"

Her mother, also, remained safe and secure one of the large bays. Also, sleeping under a fake name.

Harry sighed and stretched his arm out, guiding Ryder away from that door. Ryder went, despite her legs' resistance to the idea. "Your mother's condition is stable. There's some interesting treatment possibilities, but no promises yet." She knew that. He had already told her all about the possibilities, in detail.

Treatments that seemed to help stem neurological degeneration were discovered by treating the cryo side effects that made some people violent. There were treatments that seemed to kill off tumor growth and development, and to heal nerve damage. All found in plants grown locally throughout the cluster. It wasn't a cure exactly or a treatment, yet, but these were promising.

Thinking about the hope for her mother was an attempt to distract herself from doing what she wanted to do with every fiber of her being. The fact that it was entirely unwise notwithstanding.

"Have you told them about LJ?" Harry asked. "Any of them?"

And there was that. Only four people knew why she was so interested in that door: Johnathan, Sam, Harry, and Lexi. All of whom agreed that it was up to her to talk about the other Ryder. She hadn't said anything when she had just woken up, when everything had gone to hell, because - why bring it up? There was so much to do, and so much to worry about already. To throw one more person into the mix? They already looked at her with such pity after her father's death and her brother's coma. One more missing person on the ship was just too much. After a while, it had become harder and harder to say something. Drack and Vetra would bond over raising Kesh and Sid and Ryder would die a little inside.

"Well, you had the conversation with Lexi, but, no, no one else knows."

"Not even..?"

Jaal. Not even Jaal, who would be over the goddamn moon about it. But there would definitely be the 'why did you wait so long to tell me?' conversation. And she had no real answer for that. It wasn't like the opportunity to confess hadn't come up, several times. She had literally told Jaal everything. Everything. About her real job with the Alliance, about the suspicions around Jien Garson's death, about this mysterious benefactor. Fuck, she had even told him about the Reapers.

But this - this - she hadn't.

After the Kett stealing the Hyperion, they had talked about the future, her and Jaal. Realizing they were both on the same page, realizing that every future she could imagine had him in it. She knew there was coming a point that she had to tell him or risk loosing everything. And that moment was coming soon. Especially, since the bad, bad idea was lodging in her head and heart.

"I was planning to," Ryder said. "Tell Jaal, I mean. Soon-ish."

"'Soon-ish'?"

Ryder curled her arms around herself and nodded.

"So, maybe I should let you know that before the Kett attacked, we had taken three of the children under five out of cryo, safely and all of them are thriving on Eos. Even a five month old."

"What about vaccines and stuff?"

"I wouldn't have risked it if we hadn't felt they were completely safe," he said. "These parents were taking enough of a risk being part of the Initiative in the first place."

"Yeah, I know," Ryder said. "I just…"

"It's what you're think of doing, though, isn't it?"

Ryder nodded, then shook her head. "It's a terrible idea."

Harry frowned. Ryder prepared herself for a lecture, but he just shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe not. You saved the Cluster. We owe you, at least a little. But, whatever you decide, I wouldn't put off telling Jaal much longer. He's in it for the long haul, he has a right to know what that entails. All of it."

"I know. 'Soon-ish', remember?"

"Maybe more soon-er, than 'ish'," he replied.

***

Ryder was pacing in front of the tram entrance.

Harry had been a hundred percent right, as usual. So before she chickened out, Ryder called Jaal and asked him to meet her in the cryo bay. She trusted Jaal with her life and her heart, but there was still a small part of her that feared this might be the thing to drive him away. It was a small, stupid part of her made stubborn by too often being right.

Until she had met Jaal. Jaal had defied that voice at every turn of their relationship, she reminded herself. He would do so again.

"Evah?" Sam's voice came across their private channel.

"Yeah, Sam?"

"I predict with ninty-nine percent certainty that Jaal will react positively to your news. Why are you nervous?"

"That one percent is a bitch," Ryder replied.

The tram doors opened and three humans and one Angaran poured out. The humans were not people she knew, but the Angaran took her breath away as he always did. Jaal stood maybe half a head taller than she did, purple and white skin, eyes like a nebula. He wasn't wearing his armor or rofjinn today. Today, he was in casual Angaran clothes that did nothing to hide his considerable muscle mass. Muscles she loved to be engulfed by. Which he did, immediately, as if they hadn't seen each other in weeks instead of hours. His bioelectricity hummed along her skin, a soft song singing his happiness without words. She had become very fluent in the language Angaran bioelectricity spoke. Ryder wished more and more she had a way to speak it back to him, though Jaal seemed to understand her perfectly without it. She buried her face into his jinesh, the cowl of flesh that framed his face, enjoying the scent of Havarl's laovaan flowers that followed him.

Even through her nervousness, she couldn't help but smile. Especially when she pulled away and his eyes met hers.

He gave her a heart stopping smile. "Taoshay!" Jaal always sounded like seeing her was a brilliant surprise.

She could understand that. He was the best surprise the universe had ever gifted her... well, maybe second best. Heaviness settled in her stomach as she remembered why she had asked him to meet her. He must have seen something in her expression because his smile waned.

"What's wrong?"

Ryder shook her head. She pulled from his embrace, but took his hand to guide him towards the door. "Nothing's wrong, honey. Well, I mean, there's nothing bad or dangerous, exactly. And I think you'll be happy about it, but there's something I haven't told you. Something I probably should have. No, I definitely should have told you. A while ago, like a really long time ago, but I just-"

Jaal stopped moving forward. He took the hand she had been guiding him with and pulled her back into his arms. "Darling One, breathe and then speak."

She huffed out a weak laugh and took several deep breaths. Using the time to form what she needed to say. "I love you. And I want us to have a future, together. But there's something I've been keeping from you. And I have no good explanation for why. It's not a bad thing. It's not something that will keep us apart. I mean, fuck, you know everything about me at this point. Well, except this thing. And I don't want you to think that you not knowing this before now, changes... that."

Jaal's face scrunched in a ball as he tried to parse out what she just said, but his hold on her did not waver. "Dearest, I do know you and there is nothing you can tell me that will change how I feel about you."

Ryder picked at his shirt. She so hoped he was right. "Okay. Well, then, come on." She began pulling him along, again.

He followed silently but there was a sharp spiky current in his bioelectricity. A sensation she recognized as fear. She brought him to the door of the cryo bay, then turned aside and pulled him down a different hall to the smaller cryo bay stationed more securely inside the ark. Finally, she went through that damn door, pulling Jaal with her.

The Initiative had decorated the pediatric cryo bay very differently than the sterile adult bay. Here there were more muted colors and softer lights. The walls were painted a leaf green color, the floors were the dark brown of rich dirt. The ceiling wasn't exposed to the outside, but there was a projection of stars overhead. It gave the feeling of walking through a park at night instead of a cryo bay full of sleeping children.

This bay was smaller than the adult ones, but not by that much. Twenty thousand humans, nearly two thousand of which were minors. Older teenagers, sixteen and up went in the adult bays. Fifteen and under were right here. Jaal followed Ryder to the much, much smaller pods. Ones barely half the size of a regular adult pod.

She knew which one it was. She had been there to carefully lower her precious cargo into her own pod, fast asleep. Ryder went directly to it, locked into the wall. She pressed a hand against the metal as if she could feel the little baby inside. It just felt cold.

The pod said in bold, blue lettering: 'E. J. Reilly'. Her father had picked the last name. Ryder hadn't thought much about it up until she found out about her mom.

"Evah," Jaal's voice grounded her. "Who is this to you?" He his current bounced along her arm. He was barely containing his curiosity and worry.

"Ellen Joanne Ryder," she said. "LJ. That's what we call her. My daughter."

He sucked in a breath. His current stuttered. "Daughter?"

Ryder nodded. She braced for some sort of anger or yelling. There was a gentle hand on her shoulder and a gentler voice. "Please, taoshay. Tell me."

She turned to face him. Still shaking, still waiting for that other shoe to drop between them. "I found out just after dad told us about the Initiative. I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't want to give her up, but six hundred year cryo? On unproven engines? To a strange galaxy?"

"What about her father?"

"Ugh, I would never call him that," Ryder said. "We'd broken up. Partly because I was leaving, mostly because I realized he was an asshole. He didn't change my opinion when I told him I was pregnant. He called me a lot of terrible things and told me to… not go through with the pregnancy."

Jaal stiffened. She had the distinct impression that if he could go six hundred years into the past and two million light years to the Milky Way, he would hunt him down and kill him. Ryder squeezed his hand and smiled.

"Clearly I told him to fuck off. And he did."

"And, clearly, you decided the risk was worth it."

"My dad. He swore to me that he wouldn't have asked us to do this if he didn't believe beyond a doubt that it would succeed." Ryder turned back to her daughter's pod and placed her hand against it. She imagined her little face and how her little green eyes would light up. She was a happy baby, all smiles. "He was right."

Jaal placed his hand over hers. He pressed against her back, arm around her waist, giving her warmth and support. "You want to bring her out of cryo."

Ryder nodded. "Everything that's happened... I just want to hold her. I want to make sure she's okay with my own eyes. I don't want these machines to give me readings that say everything's fine. I want to feel her breath and see her smile." She wasn't sure when the tears had started, but they were falling down her face in full force. "I just really want to hold my baby girl."

Jaal lowered his chin to her shoulder, she pressed her temple to his jinesh. He had tears also. "Why don't you have her woken up? There is no one here who would argue."

"I'm still the Pathfinder, Jaal. Even with the Archon gone, the Kett are still a menace. And it's not like the Tempest is babyproof."

He was silent for a few seconds. There was a light kind of hiccup in his bioelectricity. Something she'd said confused him. "I suspect 'babyproof' means something different than it sounds."

"To 'babyproof' is to make an item or area safe for infants and young children by eliminating or minimizing potential hazards," Sam offered.

"Thank you, Sam."

"Cora grew up on a ship that was probably more dangerous than the Tempest," he said.

Ryder shuddered at some of the tales Cora had laughed about now. Ones that Ryder was certain had given the Harpers heart attacks at the time. "I'm trying to not have nightmares of her falling through railing or off the walkway."

"And Angaran parents have learned many ways of keeping our children safe from the Kett."

"How many grew up on ships, though?"

"More than you would think."

"I can protect her on the Tempest," Sam said clearly through her omni-tool.

"Uh, Sam...You don't have legs. Or arms. Or a body."

"Others do. Once she is mobile, I can inform anyone immediately if she is in danger. And make sure that no doors open for her without adult supervision. We can keep her safe," Sam insisted. Ryder had expected some percentage, not absolute certainty.

"Sam? Do you want her on the ship?"

"You miss her. And I would find the experience of her on the ship rewarding, I think."

"I want to so badly. But it feels... unfair."

Jaal pulled back, Ryder turned in his arms to face him. He peered down at her, brows hunched. "'Unfair'?"

"All these people, waiting for their kids to be released from cryo. Why should I get to bump my kid to the front of the line?"

Jaal's expression opened up. It was a look he gave her at least once a day, a look that held more volumes of love than a library had books. It always struck her breathless. He held her face in his hand, wiping her tears. "You are their - our - hero, Evah. No one would begrudge you having your child back."

"Not out loud they wouldn't, but quietly? I fought with a mob of colonists over this when we got here. I could have killed Dr. Kennedy when I found out about the risk she took to have a kid."

"That was before your people were stable. Your people have a colony. Several. There is plenty of food and space. And we all owe you. They know it, too."

"It's also completely irresponsible. A baby? On the Tempest? Going out into who knows where? Shouldn't you be talking me out of it?"

He gave her a lopsided grin. "Sam is right. We can keep her safe. She will have so much family to care for her. And I want you to be happy. If that means holding your daughter, then that is what I will encourage."

Ryder stared at him in wonder, then leaned in and kissed him. How in the universe had someone so amazing fallen in love with _her_? She was a giant knotted mess of issues and doubts. He was a brilliant, kind, brave, gorgeous, open-hearted, giant of a man. His arms wrapped around her shoulders, pulling her in further, as if to remind her that he chose her. Every day, he chose her. Even after she had sprung a child on him, he chose her.

She smiled against his mouth, her hands grasping his hips keeping herself steady. Jaal's lips were very familiar by now, still she never got bored of them. She couldn't even imagine ever getting bored of _anything_ about him. Soft and warm, with an underlying electrical current that put a thrilling spark into every nerve of her body. Eventually, her head spinning, she had to pull back. "What about you?"

"Me?"

She tried not to laugh as he blinked, his eyes still glazed from their kiss. "Would you be okay raising a human child? Or your family? Will they-?"

Jaal did laugh, so loud she almost expected some nurse to run in to tell him to keep it down he would wake the children. "Darling One, are you or are you not the one my true mother pestered for information on human children and child birth?"

Ryder groaned. That had been an awkward message to receive. Though, knowing Sahuna, Ryder was lucky she had waited until Ryder was back on the Tempest before sending a private query instead of questioning her while they were on Havarl. Ryder had dumped the message on Lexi to answer, the ship's medic was the expert in alien anatomy, after all.

"She has been preparing for human grandchildren for a long time now. Though, I suspect even she was not prepared for it to be so soon. As for me," he pressed his forehead to Ryder's, "any child of yours will be mine in my heart, no matter what. I wouldn't be able to stop myself." His bioelectricity washed waves of warmth all over her. Hope. "Is that what you want? Me to be her father?"

Ryder's grip on him tightened. "By the time she was born, I kind of expected she wouldn't have a father. Lots of father figures. Even my father. I never imagined how many uncles she would end up with." Ryder chuckled, thinking about the crew back on the Tempest and the mountains of Ama Daravs back on Havarl. "But no dad of her own. I was fine with that. Until you showed up. You will be a better father for her than I could have ever dreamed of." A moment of uncertainty made her hesitate. "If…if you're sure that's what you want, I mean."

His smile was blinding. Suddenly, Ryder was off her feet being spun around the cryo bay as Jaal cheered. Ryder wrapped her arms around his head and held on tight, laughing as the cryo bay air rushed around them. When her feet found the floor again her chest was so much lighter. Her cheeks hurt from the size of her smile. Jaal peppered kisses all over her face, meeting her lips several times. "Nothing would make me happier," he said, pulled Ryder back against him. "I can't wait to meet her."

That decided it for her. Ryder buried her face into his jinesh. "Shit. We should at least talk to the rest of the crew before dumping a baby in their laps."

Jaal reached out and placed his hand on their sleeping daughter's cryo pod. "Beautiful dreams, little one. Your mother and I will be holding you soon."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wasn't planning on posting this initially.
> 
> A couple months ago I read a nice fanfic called "Baby Ryder" and after I began thinking about how Evelyn would handle such a situation. And then I had to write it down.
> 
> And then I kept fiddling with it until I was happy with it. And then I realized that since I was happy with it I did kind of want to share.
> 
> It's about 80% done at the moment and I'll be posting about once a week.


	2. Crew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to tell the crew

Ryder and Jaal cuddled together on the shuttle back to The Tempest. She showed him photos of LJ. He oohed and aahed over his daughter like any new father. If there had been anyone else in the shuttle with them, he would have been showing them the pictures and talking about how smart and beautiful his daughter was. He hadn't even met her, yet. Ryder hadn't thought it was possible she could love him more, she had been wrong. 

She also sent a message ahead, asking the crew to collect in the Meeting Room for an announcement. Jaal agreed not to tell Sahuna, or anyone who would tell her, until after LJ was actually out of cryo. Partly, because Ryder wasn't entirely convinced she would be able to get her out soon and didn't want to set any expectations. Mostly, Ryder just wanted to see the look on her face when her son appeared with a human baby in his arms.

The crew, plus Jonathan, had collected themselves in the meeting room by the time she and Jaal had arrived back to The Tempest. Drack had taken up a spot at the table, his shotgun in pieces in front of him. Liam, Suvi, and Kallo squeezed together on one of the couches. Peebee lounging on the railing looking out the back of the ship. Gil not far from her, leaning back on his arms. Cora stood at attention as always. Vetra had a hip up on the table near Drack. Lexi and Jonathan had taken up the other couch. Ryder did a double-take seeing her brother. 

Jonathan shrugged. "I can't lay around the medbay all day." 

Ryder sighed, she would nag him about taking better care of himself later.

Butterflies had woken back up in her stomach, she took a deep breath to settle them down. For so long she had forced herself to not think about her daughter. Any time she did, any passing thought of her always spiraled into fear and crying. Was she really asleep? Was she stuck in a nightmare? Was she safe? Did she wonder where her mom was? All those people who used to keep her warm and fed. Now she was so close to being with her daughter again, these people could curtail that hope. She could order her daughter out of cryo, but if her crew didn't agree, then LJ would have no safe place to land.

"I have a confession to make," Ryder started.

"You two get hitched?" Drack asked without looking up from cleaning his shotgun.

Ryder froze. "What? No, not yet." _Not yet?_ She hadn't meant to say that. Jaal shot her a look of bemusement. And maybe a little bit of hope

"There's no way they'd get married without us there," Gil laughed. "Would you, Ryder?"

"Of course not," Jaal said.

She shrugged. "Meh, I'm on the fence about it." Gil threw her a faux-scandalized expression. Ryder just blew a raspberry back at him. Jaal rolled his eyes, way too used to their antics. Ryder took another deep breath. Those butterflies just kept coming back. "No, Jaal and I did not get married. I've been keeping something from all of you, well, Jonathan and Lexi know, but I just didn't tell the rest of you."

Jaal's hand on her shoulder stopped the babble before she really got a head of steam.

"I want to bring someone onto The Tempest. It seemed like I - we - should speak with you about it first because it's going to make some things complicated."

"If you're bringing Tann, I'm serving him on a side of toast," Drack said.

"What? No. Eww. No."

"Avitus?" Peebee asked.

"No, he's got his own crew to worry about-"

"Kesh?" Liam offered.

Drack barked out a laugh. "You'd have to pry her off that station with a nuke and a crowbar."

"Nah," Vetra's eyes narrowed and her mandibles flared with amusement. "She wouldn't look so nervous if it was Kesh."

That just kicked them all off. Several more suggestions were thrown out, like Ryder wasn't just standing there waiting for them to shut up so she could tell them. Jaal flashed her a small grin and a shrug that said _"what are you going to do, they're family."_

Through all the chaos, her brother remained still. When she caught his eye, he mouthed "LJ?" As if he was afraid to say it out loud would curse it or something. His face was bright red, eyes wide. He adored his niece. He probably had more pictures of her than Ryder did.

Ryder nodded.

Jonathan cheered.

And that shut everyone up. They turned to stare at Jonathan who was just beaming.

"We already knew about him," Liam said. "Been talking about Johnny coming aboard for weeks."

Ryder laughed. "Not him. I mean, yeah, _when he's cleared by the docs_ ," she emphasized the doctors bit for Jonathan's benefit, "he's coming with us. Her name is LJ." _Here goes nothing._ "She's my daughter."

Everyone else just stared at her. Ryder counted. Six seconds, then the room exploded again.

"Daughter?"

"How old is she?"

"Who?"

"What?"

_"Daughter?"_

"Why didn't you tell us?"

"How?"

**Daughter?"**

"Are there pictures?"

"There have to be pictures!"

**_"What?"_ **

Drack just laughed so hard he had to put the shotgun down. Kallo's head swiveled, watching everyone else shout, as if he couldn't decide how he was supposed to react. Lexi remained perfectly calm and poised while the rest of her crew collectively lost their minds. The others kept hollering half-heard questions. Their expressions were mostly shock, a couple looked less than happy, but most seemed to have some sort of smile on their face. That was promising.

After another ten seconds, Ryder put her fingers to her lips and let loose an ear-piercing whistle. Silence fell again. "Kinda hard for me to answer questions if you keep yelling at me."

"Ryder, are you sure this is a good idea?" Lexi asked. 

Ryder shook her head. "No. But I'm doing it."

" _Lexi_ knew?" Cora demanded. She did not look pleased.

"Of course Lexi knew. First complete physical, she going to notice some things," Ryder replied. 

"How young are we talking here?" Vetra asked. "You're barely not a kid yourself by human standards, right?"

"Humans can start having children very young," Lexi offered. "Though most wait until their older."

"She's six months-"

"Six _months_?" Liam broke in. "You brought a six month old _baby_?"

She had expected this. Liam was the one who attacked Vetra for bringing her sister. A baby was a lot smaller and more fragile than a teenage Turian. Even expecting it, though, the disappointment in his voice felt like a needle in her gut. "It wasn't exactly a decision I made lightly, Liam." 

Liam's face went through every emotion from anger to hurt to resigned. "You're the Pathfinder," he said, finally, with a shrug and a sour face.

"Liam-" Ryder began, but she didn't really know what else to say.

Jaal wrapped an arm around Ryder's shoulders and pinned Liam with a deep scowl. "Liam, Evah wishes to be reunited with her - our - daughter. You would deny her that after everything she has done to make sure this Cluster is habitable for _all_ children? If you cannot be happy for us, then we cannot be friends any longer."

Liam kept up the sour face for a few more seconds, but then it crumbled. "Shit." He wiped his hand down his face. "Shit. You're right. Sorry, Ryder. I just… I'm worried."

"Yeah, me, too. But Sam says we can do this. And I really, really want this."

Jaal turned his angry gaze on Cora who instantly raised her hands in defense. "I'm not upset about the baby," she said. "I'm just…" Cora sighed. "Everything we've been through together. I'm just hurt that we didn't know about her before now."

"Dad didn't want the Initiative to know. She's not even listed under the name 'Ryder'. He thought it would be best to keep it from everyone who didn't absolutely have to know. When we launched, only the three of us, and Sam, and Harry knew. The only reason Lexi ever knew was because she took over as medic." At the time, Ryder had thought her father was being a bit paranoid, but knowing what she did now, she was relieved she hadn't argued.

Ryder took a deep breath and plowed on. "I didn't say anything later because it just hurt so much to talk about her. Shit, it hurt to _think_ about her so far away. Sleeping. Where I couldn't see her. Make sure she was okay. And so much else was going on…." It was already starting again, that cold panic of wondering where her baby was. It crawled up from her heart and out to her fingertips. Jaal pulled her a little closer and warmth suffused her skin. LJ was safe. She was asleep. She would wake up and not remember a second of over six hundred and thirty years, just like Ryder had. Still, Ryder's voice wavered. "I just _couldn't_ talk about her. Hell, Harry's the one who told Lexi. Jaal didn't even know until, like, an hour ago."

Cora nodded, arms still crossed. "I get that, I do. I guess this explains why you didn't come to the Initiative until late. It must have been tough."

"It's been tough for all of us. I'm sorry, Cora," Ryder said. "Sorry to _everyone_ for not saying something sooner."

"Look at us, being all open with our feelings," Gil said. "Looks like Jaal's rubbing off on us."

"Some of us more than others," Peebee flashed a wide, innocent smile at Ryder and Jaal, who were still leaning heavily on each other. Everyone burst into laughter, including Ryder. She laughed until she could barely stand up anymore. The stress she had been carrying faded to the background for a little while.

"I have to ask, what about her dad?" Gil said, after his laughing faded.

"Jaal's her dad," Ryder replied.

While he smiled at that, he didn't let it drop. "I'm serious. Is he in cryo? Or…?"

Ryder shook her head. "The person that gave her some of his DNA had no interested in being a father let alone a dad. He fucked off pretty much the second I told him I was pregnant. He knew I was heading to Andromeda and made no move to stop me - us. Hell, every message I sent him after telling him about the pregnancy bounced back. Far as he's concerned, he gave up any parental rights well over six hundred and thirty-four years ago. I didn't even put him on the birth certificate."

"We are all happy to be rid that asshole, believe me," Jonathan said, waving his omni-tool, as if just waiting for this moment. "I have pictures you've _got_ to see!" Everyone immediately surrounded him, watching with rapt fascination as he scrolled through baby pictures. Suvi was already thinking up science experiments to keep LJ entertained. Drack pointed out how squishy human babies were and started to plan out loud what they needed to do to stop her from hurting herself. Lexi informed him that lining the walls with foam was excessive. Ryder wasn't sure she agreed with the doctor's assessment

Cora and Liam nearly died at a picture of sleep-deprived Alec Ryder feeding newborn LJ. 

"We're not gonna be up all night with the baby, are we?" Peebee craned her head up for a second. "Some of us need our beauty sleep."

Ryder shook her head. "Not likely. My room is soundproofed and she was starting to sleep through the night when we left, anyway." 

"I should probably get on finding some baby supplies then," Vetra opened her omni-tool.

"LJ's stuff is in storage."

"Ryder, you lost all your stuff when the Hyperion hit the Scourge." As if that was something Ryder would ever forget.

"My stuff, yes, but the children's footlockers were kept with the children. LJ's stuff is still safe and sound."

"You got a crib?" Vetra asked.

"The Initiative has cribs for the babies."

The Turian snorted. "I've seen those things. Little better than a plastic box."

"I'm probably going to be ruffling a couple feathers ordering her out of cryo, Vetra. I'd rather not make things worse."

" _Trust me_ , Ryder," she said, continuing to scroll through her list of contacts on her omni-tool.

That's when it hit her. They were saying yes. This was happening. They were going to help. They were going to support her in this. They were _happy_ to.

"Guys?" Ryder's voice shook. Everyone looked up. "Thank you. All of you."

"Of course," Vetra said. "What's family for?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have way too much fun writing Drack.
> 
> Next chapter might take a bit longer, it has some things that still need tweaking.
> 
> There will be baby. Though, my only knowledge of 6 month old babies is Google and when my nephew was 6 months old - 6 years ago.
> 
> You can find me at my hodgepodge of a [Tumblr](https://midnightswaltz.tumblr.com/).


	3. Baby

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> LJ wakes up to a new galaxy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _jinesh_ : term for the cowl that surrounds an Angaran's head. Created by MyrddinDerwydd of the [ Angaran Expansion Project](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1458790)
> 
> Other terms or Angaran names are either canon or I made up.
> 
> My experience with 6 month old babies is very limited. Most of my knowledge comes from Google and vague memories of when my nephew was that little.

Ryder approached the door to the pediatric wing of cryo bay. She carried a fluffy blanket in her hands and Jaal and Jonathan at her side. The blanket was dark blue and covered in little white stars. A gift from LJ's grandfather before they put her into cryo sleep.

It had taken several days, four fights with Addison, and one and a half ignored lectures from Tann, but Ryder had ordered LJ removed from cryo. During the week, the crew had gathered around the table in the Meeting Room and drawn up plans to prepare the Tempest for the baby. Vetra and Drack pointed out all the places that would need to some adjustments to protect a squishy human baby, or protect them _from_ a squishy human baby. Ryder had pointed out that LJ wasn't even mobile, yet.  
Drack's voice was heavy when he replied, "she will be before you can blink."

Vetra had LJ's footlocker sent to the Tempest. It was the same size as Ryder's had been, the children having been given the same amount of space as the the adults for luggage. When she had opened it up, the smell of milk and powder that followed LJ spilled out and hit Ryder in the gut. Jaal sat with her as she went through all of LJ's toys and clothes. Her hands trembled as she touched each and every one, telling him all the LJ stories and fears she had kept locked away for nearly a year. _Soon_ , Jaal reminded her. LJ was sleeping and safe and she would wake up soon.

Ryder had spent some time giving Jaal some instructions on how to care for a human baby. At one point, he had practiced changing a diaper on one of LJ's stuffed animals, a large teddy bear Jonathan had gotten her. It was probably the most adorable thing she had ever seen in her life.

Finally, after dinner one night, the notice from Harry arrived. LJ's was scheduled to be removed from her pod the next morning at ten hundred hours. Ryder got exactly zero sleep that night. She laid awake in the dark, listening to Jaal breathe. Excitement had not kept him awake.

At oh-nine fifty, she, Jaal, and Jonathan had left the Tempest heading for the cryo bay. During that week, Jonathan had finally gotten cleared for duty and officially assigned to the Tempest and the Pathfinder team. He didn't walk with a limp or lethargy that Ryder had noticed previously. He even managed to keep up with the near running pace Ryder kept all the way to the cryo bay.

Entering the bay, Ryder made a beeline for Harry standing over one of the "plastic boxes" Vetra despaired of. He was smiling.

"Perfect timing," he looked up from the biomonitor. "It looks like she's coming around now."

Ryder shook as she peered into the crib and saw LJ. She was in a dark blue onesie that matched the blanket. She was sleeping on her back, arms spread out, fingers curled in. A thin strip of soft hair down the crown of her head, like a little red mohawk. Her dna donor had been blond haired and blue eyed, but aside from a slightly lighter skin color than Ryder's tan, LJ had inherited nothing from him. She had Ryder's red hair and green eyes and her nose looked to be impressive one day. Time would tell if she would get the freckles, too.

Her little fingers stretched, her face twitched lightly. She reached for her daughter but hesitated, almost afraid this was a dream.

"It's okay to touch her," Harry said. "I wouldn't recommend picking her up until after she wakes up though. They tend to be cranky and spit up."

Ryder reached in and stroked her daughter's face and grasped her little hand. LJ's skin felt so cold, likely a side effect of the cryo stasis. LJ's hand twitched again and Ryder let her latch onto a finger. Her grip was strong and her tiny nails pricked at Ryder's skin, but not painfully. "Hey, baby, mommy's here. I missed you so much. You slept through a lot."

A soft current buzzed along her back. "May I touch her?" Jaal asked.

Ryder smiled up at him. "Of course, she's your daughter now, too."

Harry hovered, watching Jaal's interaction intently. Probably curious as to what affect the Angaran bioelectricity would have. Jaal reached into the crib, brushing his fingers against her cheek. Even asleep, LJ seemed fascinated by this new sensation, her free hand opened and closed faster and she leaned towards Jaal's touch.

"I…" Jaal stared, transfixed. "I didn't expect…she's so soft and small."

"I think she likes you," Jonathan teased, snapping a picture.

"I like her, too," Jaal replied.

LJ's finger wrapped around Jaal's thumb and he completely melted.

Jonathan laughed. "Oh, yeah, look at that face, he's done for."

Ryder and Jaal just stood over LJ, her hands wrapped around them, waiting for their daughter to wake up.

It was only a minute or so later that LJ hiccuped, her grip on Ryder's finger tightened. The hiccuping turned into a whimper as her face twisted into extreme displeasure.

"Uh, oh," Jonathan said. "Prepare yourself, Jaal. Her screaming can be legendary."

The hiccuping continued. Harry came over and examined her. He and Ryder turned LJ onto her side as she began coughing up some light fluid. Then a loud wail, erupted from her daughter. The piercing quality, thankfully, absorbed by the walls. Jaal looked mildly alarmed, but Ryder was focused on LJ, who shook like a leaf as Harry continued his exam. After a few moments, he assured Ryder that LJ was fine.

The second Harry ok'ed it, Ryder picked her daughter up and pulled her close. The complete and utter relief Ryder felt at holding her baby again was indescribable. Air rushed back into Ryder's lungs, like she had been holding her breath for a year. Tears started trailing down her cheeks. LJ buried her face into Ryder's neck, her fists grabbing at Ryder's shirt and hair.

"It's okay, baby. Mommy's got you," Ryder kissed LJ's head and wrapped the blue blanket around her tiny body. "I am so sorry you had to do that, but you're safe now."

Jaal hovered nearby. His hands twitching at his sides, eyes wide as he watched the two of them. Ryder waved him over. She took his hand and placed it on LJ's back. His other arm went around Ryder as he pressed his forehead against hers. An overwhelming sense of peace settled down around her. She was back with her daughter. Her family was coming back together a piece at a time. Jaal at her side, wiping away her tears. LJ's shaking and crying subsided as her little body warmed up. There was another hiccuping sound. Ryder peered down to see LJ practically eating her own hand.

"Oh, somebody's hungry."

LJ glanced up at Ryder, bright green eyes wide and searching, until they landed on Jaal and froze.

"Hello," Jaal said.

LJ just stared, hand still in mouth. Ryder laughed. "LJ, this is Jaal. He's your dad. Trust me. I'd only pick the best dad for you."

"There's some chairs over there," Harry said, handing Ryder a warmed bottle. In a hidden corner of the bay was a small couch and two squishy chairs, likely exactly for times like this.

"Thanks, Harry."

Ryder settled into the couch with the excessively wriggling LJ. She patted the spot next to her where Jaal settled in. LJ immediately latched onto the bottle and began suckling. LJ had always been really good with the bottle. Thankfully, because Ryder had never produced much milk and had been kind of relieved when it had dried up. LJ had never cared. There was warm food and a warm body with a familiar scent holding her.

Feeding LJ didn't take as long as she expected. It appeared, hungry as she had been, maybe she was more interested in exploring this strange place she had woken up in. And the strange person, too. Almost the second she turned her head away from the bottle, she held out her hands to Jaal and grunted.

Anyone from any galaxy knew what that meant.

"Might want to give it a minute," Ryder sat LJ up with a diaper rag under her chin. "She was really good about not needing to be burped before we left the Milky Way, but there were a few accidents."

"I wouldn't mind," Jaal insisted.

Ryder had been gently patting LJ's back through this brief conversation, at which point, LJ spit up all over the diaper. Jaal glanced down, but his face barely changed at all.

Ryder smirked at him. "How long were you practicing that 'I'm not grossed out' look in the mirror?"

"You did warn me. And Angaran babies do something similar," he said, using a clean corner of the cloth to wipe LJ's face. "There. See. Like it never happened." He wrapped up the dirty rag and placed it on the floor, then reached for LJ.

LJ slid into his arms with ease, immediately grasping his jinesh and squealing. After she settled, LJ looked up at him and began babbling, trying to lift his rofjinn in her fist.

"This is my rofjinn, Precious One. One day I will sew one for you, if you would like," Jaal said. LJ made several cheerful squeals and babbles. "I am glad you approve. Er…she's not saying something the translator is overlooking, is she?"

Ryder laughed. "No, honey. She's just making random noises now. It won't be too long before she figures out which ones make sense, though."

"Of course she will, because she's brilliant, isn't she?" he said to LJ. "Just like her mother."

He lifted her in his arms and brought her in for a kiss on the cheek. LJ made a couple strange gurgling noises, then a great peel of baby laughter rang out. Jonathan and Harry jumped, wide, stupid grins on their faces.

"Got it on video!" Jonathan announced.

Jaal looked between them all, LJ cradled safely in his arms. "Did I do something wrong?"

"No!" Ryder said, with a wide, stupid grin on her own face. "No, not remotely."

"That was her first laugh, wasn't it," Harry said.

Jaal glanced down at LJ who was exploring his rofjinn with hand and mouth.

"Yeah, it was. I was starting to get worried, but…" Ryder gave her own laugh. "You are a wonder, Jaal Ama Darav." A new ball of emotion rose in Ryder's throat. She kissed Jaal's cheek and laid her head on his shoulder. Every doubt she had about this, about any of this - dragging her daughter to Andromeda, opening her life and heart to Jaal, taking LJ out of cryo early, asking him to help her raise her - every doubt evaporated. Gone like it had never existed. Ryder played with LJ's feet and LJ focused on grabbing Jaal's free fingers. "I think this was meant to be."

****

LJ slept in a carrier on Ryder's chest. She had drifted off in Jaal's arms not long after her first laugh. Though, not before her second and third laugh. It was clear, LJ adored her father as much as he adored her. After she was well asleep, the family said their goodbyes and thank yous to Harry and headed back to the Tempest.

Several of the crew were working on installing clear panels in the railings in the cargo bay. They had already finished with adding gates and fencing around the lift and ladders.

"Ryder's back!" Peebee shouted from somewhere over Ryder's head.

Gil immediately dropped his panel, getting a well-deserved chewing out from Drack. The rest of the Tempest's crew appeared from their various hidey-holes. LJ squirmed a little, still asleep, though from the shape of her mouth, that might not be for much longer.

"Guys," Ryder kept her voice quiet and wrapped her arms protectively around LJ. "She's sleeping. Keep it down."

The sounds immediately stopped even though everyone still gathered around to gawk.

Peebee peered over the walkway above them. "Wow. I've never seen a human baby before. I mean except in movies 'n stuff. She looks way squishier than I was expecting."

Gil gave LJ a hands off look over. "She's a cutie, Ryder."

"Come on, people," Vetra waved through the small crowd. "You can see the baby later. After she wakes up in her new crib we spent half an hour setting up."

Ryder narrowed her eyes, but headed through the path that had opened up, Jaal following behind. Jonathan stayed to distract the crew with new pictures.

"What new crib?" Ryder asked. "You didn't bargain someone out of a family heirloom or something?"

"Have a little faith in me, Ryder."

The door to their quarters opened and Ryder gasped.

Behind her couch there was an honest-to-god wooden rocking chair and crib. Both the chair and crib were made of the same dark, cherry colored wood. At first, Ryder thought it was mahogany, but then realized it had a different but familiar scent. Not one from the Milky Way.

"These did not come with the Initiative, did they?" Ryder reached out to touch the crib. The wood was the softness of Willows Wisp. They were trees native to half the cluster well known for their delicate looking leaves and flashes of blue light that traveled along the branches. The Angara called them Invari. They were harmless and beautiful and smelled something like lavender and vanilla. The crib had small carvings of various animals of the Cluster. Along the bottom was an intricate scene of the planet-setting over the Forge on Havarl. It was breathtaking.

"Jaal got me in touch with an Angaran woodworker," Vetra said.

Ryder glanced at Jaal, his cheeks turned a deeper color, but he smiled, placing a gentle hand on the sleeping LJ.

Vetra contiued. "We and Sam and Lexi worked together for something safe for her. I read human babies like to put their mouths on everything, so the wood's safe to be gnawed on. The chair was Cora's idea. The Angara apparently don't have anything like it. It was interesting having to find the designs for the thing. Saloaa, the woodworker, loved the idea. She said it's sturdy enough for Jaal. I think she's working on adapting it for Angara."

As Vetra babbled, Ryder quietly handed LJ to Jaal, then turned around and hugged the Turian. Vetra stopped speaking immediately. "This is amazing! You outdid yourself," Ryder said into Vetra's armor.

"Yes, well, family." Vetra cleared her throat as Ryder released her. "We bolted the crib to the floor, and there's an anti-grav net in case anything goes wrong. She'll be safer than the rest of us. There's also a portable crib that you can take up to the bridge or wherever. It's got these super strong magnets in there that'll keep it pretty firmly attached to wherever you stick it. Also, here." Vetra handed Ryder a package she had been hiding behind her back. Ryder pulled apart the wrapping to discover a worn, gray blanket with little cartoon Turians on it. "It was Sid's. She wanted the baby to have it. I know she's probably got her own-"

"She'll love it," Ryder said. "Thank you, Vetra. And thank Sid for us, too."

Jaal placed LJ in her new crib. Her legs kicked and for a moment, Ryder thought she was waking up again, but she settled down quickly. Vetra came over to look at her. "She really is pretty cute, Ryder."

"Yes, she is. Thank you, Vetra. I mean it."

"Of course. I'll leave you guys alone for now."

Vetra exited. Ryder and Jaal just stood over LJ watching her sleep for a bit. As difficult as it was to take her eyes off of her, the adrenaline keeping Ryder awake the last 24 hours was waning. She was having difficulty keeping her eyes open. Jaal pulled her to their bed, encouraging her to lay down.

She watched as he pulled a familiar device from the shelf and placed it on the floor by the crib. A touch of a button and the ceiling was awash in glowing curls of stars. Jaal quietly removed his rofjinn, patted LJ's sleeping form, then curled up behind behind Ryder, wrapping an arm around her waist.

They watched their daughter sleep.

"Thank you," Jaal said. "For sharing her."

"We're family, Jaal. Speaking of, when LJ wakes up, we should call your mothers," Ryder said.

He hummed in agreement. "That should prove to be interesting."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is getting longer than expected...
> 
> You can find me at my hodgepodge of a [Tumblr](https://midnightswaltz.tumblr.com/).


	4. Awake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes you just need some family time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long. My creativity and energy levels did not want to cooperate.

The first thing Ryder noticed was the singing. Gentle and deep and definitely Jaal. It was in Shelesh. Despite her lessons, she couldn't make out most of the words. From what she did recognize, it was about home and family. Safety together. Better than human lullabies about cracked eggs and falling cradles.

Underneath his voice was a light creaking sound. Ryder opened her eyes and her heart twisted. Jaal sat in the rocking chair, LJ laid in the crook of his arm, bottle in her mouth. Her hands wrapped loosely around the cap and one little leg hung off Jaal arm, swinging gently as they both swayed in the chair. Jaal looked down on his new daughter with a smile as he sang to her.

Ryder had this dream so many times before. Maybe not with the lullaby, but Jaal holding LJ. Being a dad to her. A dream she hadn't dared say out loud. The universe had already taken so many of her hopes and tossed them out the window. Giving this one a voice felt like too great a risk. But Jaal was good at convincing her to take risks.

Disrupting this moment seemed like sacrilege, so Ryder stayed still watching Jaal care for their daughter. Listening to him sing to her. LJ looked as entranced by his voice as Ryder always was.

Shortly after, though, the lullaby ended. Jaal looked up at Ryder, completely unsurprised to see she was awake. "Sleep well?"

"Yeah, for the first time in what feels like forever," Ryder pulled herself into a sitting position. "I really liked waking up to you singing, too. It was beautiful."

"Thank you. LJ seemed to enjoy it. She woke up some time ago and I didn't want to disturb you."

"How long was I out?"

"A few hours. She made a mess in her diaper," Jaal admitted. "But between your lessons and some assistance from Sam, I think we did well getting her clean again."

Ryder smiled. "You look like you are enjoying yourself."

"I am," he said. "This. You, her and me. Us. It makes me happy."

Ryder's smile widened. She took the two steps to the chair and knelt down, taking one of LJ's hands in her own. "Me, too, Jaal."

LJ wrapped her hand around Ryder's fingers. When she had been born, she could barely get a hand around one finger, now she could grasp almost two and her grip was strong. Ryder kissed her daughter's hand and then temple. She was here and safe.

There was still the undercurrent of worry. Ryder doubted it would ever really go away. So many night cycles, sitting in this room, wondering when she would get to see LJ again. If she would. So much had gone wrong and so much more could have. Ryder had gone so far as to leave a message to Kesh, explaining everything, in case the worst happened. She had just wanted someone she trusted to one day be able to tell her daughter who she was and where she came from and Kesh had seemed the one most likely to come out of everything alive.

The cat was out of the bag now. They should probably specify who was to raise LJ if anything happened to her. When they had left the Milky Way, all the remains of Ryder's family had come with her. Her father, brother, LJ, and adopted uncle, Harry. Now, mostly because of Jaal, her family had expanded to roughly size of a small village, or maybe even a large village. If anything happened to her, there was going to be a fight over LJ.

"What are you thinking, Darling One?"

Ryder met his eyes. "I was just thinking how she is always going to have family. Even if something happens to us, there's always going to be someone to look after her. Because of you. Thank you, Jaal."

Jaal frowned, his eyes widened. "Evah, you do not need to thank me for that."

"I know, but I want to," Ryder said. "You amaze me everyday, honey. Your kindness. Your patience. God, I handed you a baby and you just laughed and started singing to her."

"How else would I have reacted? Children are a blessing. _She_ is a blessing, Evah."

"Does it bother you at all? That I didn't tell you about her sooner?"

Jaal frowned. He stared at her without speaking for so long tension wound up her spine and into her neck. Her lungs felt leaden. His eyes bore deep into her own, concern in the corner of his mouth and confusion in the tilt of his head, trying to puzzle out if there was another question she was asking. He was always good at it: deciphering when she was having trouble finding the right words.

"Dearest, I am not angry with you, if that is what you are truly worried about," he finally spoke.

The pressure tightening her back shattered and she was able to take a breath. She nodded, a solid lump in her throat made it difficult to speak. "Sometimes it seems like you are too good to be true. I keep waiting for you to figure out that I am way more trouble than I'm worth."

He made a wounded sound. "You have given me so many gifts, Evah. Purpose. Hope. Strength." He shot her a mischievous grin. "Many wonderful nights." Ryder felt her cheeks turn hot as he carried on. "Days of laughter. Not to mention a beautiful daughter. That you gave me your heart amazes me everyday. I could not want for more. You are not a burden. Loving you is not a burden."

Tears gathered at the corners of her eyes. Her heart pounded like it was about to beat out of her chest. Her face was still warm, but for a much different reason. Ryder stared at LJ, unable to look at him. LJ looked back at her mother. No sadness. No fear. The man caring for her was gentle and kind. He wasn't going to mock or shame her for her emotions. He wanted them out, expressed. The harmful ones to be dealt with and healed. The happy ones to be enjoyed. Ryder turned to face him. "You are a wonder, Jaal Ama Darav," her voice was rough.

"As are you, Evelyn Ryder. And to answer what you asked, am I bothered you didn't tell me sooner? My heart aches for the pain you were going through. Alone. I wish I could have helped you carry that weight. But I understand that some grief is too deep for words. So, no, I am not bothered that you didn't tell me sooner."

"You did help me," Ryder insisted. "When you made me laugh. Every time you had my back. Every time you helped me fight the Kett. Every time we made the Cluster a little safer together. Every time you held me at night. Every time you talked about us and the future. Every time my hope built that one day we'd all be together. All three of us. I dreamt of this so many times. I wish I could have told you."

"It is all right, Taoshay. I am with you. Where ever you go." Jaal said, reminding her of the promise he had made only a few months ago now. It felt like a lifetime.

"Always. I promise." Ryder leaned up and kissed him. LJ made a brief noise of protest. Ryder laughed.

"Though," he hummed as she sat back on her knees, "if you do have anything else I should know about, could you please tell me?"

She raised her free hand and counted off. "Umm, crippling insecurities. Mysterious benefactor. Mass murdering mentor. Reapers. Mom still alive, sort of. Six month old daughter… if there's anything else, _I_ don't even know about it yet."

Jaal held their daughter until LJ indicated she was done eating then Ryder took over, patting her back for a minute. She didn't seem to need to be burped, Ryder just wanted to hold her. She was tiny and soft and still had that baby powder smell, now mixed with a bit of Jaal's fragrance. "When did you want to call your family?"

"Daar Marriv is still in a sleep cycle for another hour," he said.

"We could just call them on the way to Havarl," Ryder said. "You know your mothers are going to insist we bring the baby when they find out."

Jaal hummed. "True, but…"

"What?"

"I would like to see my mothers' faces when we tell them."

Ryder did, too, to be honest.

Comms in Heleus had most of the same issues they had in the Milky Way but a lack of relays plus the Scourge made things so much more complicated. Most contact was limited to voice or text. Diverting video calls around the Scourge took up so much bandwidth it was almost useless. QECs could make up the difference, but they were fewer and further between. There was only one on all of Havarl.

"I know it's pretty much the other side of the planet, but could you convince them to go use the QEC at Daar Palaav? I'm sure I could get the outpost to let at least one or two of them to use it."

Jaal thought. "They've gone further for less."

"Well, then, let's go show off the baby and tell Kallo to set course for Havarl."

Ryder looked down at LJ. "Oh, that means we get to show you the stars up close for the first time. Would you like that?"

LJ had no opinion, but her smile was wide as she looked up at Ryder.

As Jaal composed a message to his family, Ryder searched through the drawer she had set aside for LJ's clothes. Before leaving, she and Jonathan had gone shopping for baby clothes to try to get LJ through the next several months of growth. There were Initiative clothes for the children, of course, but those may as well have been military uniforms. Personal clothes were generally light and easily squished into a footlocker.

She pulled out a shirt that had a Dr. Seuss character on it that said "oh the places you will go" and a matching pair of striped leggings with feet. She also pulled out a small, stuffed toy about fifteen centimeters long, black, roughly in the shape of a cat with stitches for eyes. She barely had a second to hand it to LJ before her daughter clutched it to her chest. Ryder laughed. Nico, named by Jonathan, had always been the toy LJ always looked towards or tried to grab. "Yeah, you remember Nico, don't you." Ryder froze. While whole, long months had passed for since they'd arrived in Heleus, LJ had slept the entire time. It was mindboggling. "Of course you do, it's only been a few hours for you. So much happened while you were asleep. Don't worry, there's still plenty left for you to see and do. But first, we're gonna get you dressed and go introduce you to the crew."

She laid LJ on the bed to change her, stripping her out of the onesie. LJ "helped" by kicking her feet, catching Ryder on the arm a couple times. Ryder grabbed one of the baby's feet and blew a raspberry on it. LJ cackled. Warmth spread through Ryder's chest - that was the first time she had made her daughter laugh. So, Ryder did it again causing LJ to squeal with laughter. And again on LJ's arm and more laughter. Ryder glanced up and caught Jaal watching them with the softest smile on his face. Her breath caught in her throat.

Then she got a face full of stuffed cat. Ryder turned back to her daughter, looking all innocent with her wide green eyes and stuffed toy in her mouth. She rolled her eyes. "I know you're excited, Little Bit, but stop hitting mama."

After finally dressing the baby, working around LJ's weak grip on Nico, Ryder picked her up off the bed. "Ready to see your new home?" She made a weird little huffing sound and wiggled in Ryder's arms.

Jaal laughed. "I love this side of you."

"The 'trying to balance a squirming child a third my size' side?" Ryder asked, hefting the still wiggling LJ into a better position on her hip.

"That, too," he stood up from the rocking chair and pulled Ryder and LJ into his arms. "All your strength and power. Anyone who stands against you regrets it. And I love that. But this side, the gentle, happy side. It is as beautiful and I am honored you let me see it."

Warmth crept up Ryder's neck and into her cheeks and ears. She dipped her head, pressing her cheek to LJ's forehead. "Your daddy is making mommy blush. _Again_." She grinned wildly at Jaal.

"I couldn't tell," he teased and bent in for a quick kiss. He pressed his forehead to hers. Ryder stood there, eyes closed, breathing in his scent and letting his current wash over them. It was soft and warm and felt of home.

"This is nice," she said.

"Yes, it is," Jaal's voice carried laughter in it.

"But we really should go do some introductions." Ryder, reluctantly, pulled away from him. LJ made a brief noise of complaint but settled quickly, holding Nico close.

She took LJ to her desk where Sam's glowing module was. "LJ, this is your Uncle Sam. Sam this is LJ."

"Hello, LJ," Sam's light pulsed as he spoke. "I am glad you are on board."

"Uncle Sam can see you all over the ship, so if you're ever in trouble he'll be there and get you help. He's also really nice and really smart."

LJ watched the light, but she turned very quickly to movement on the other side of the desk.

"Sorry, Sam," Ryder said.

"I am not offended," Sam replied with a much earnestness as a machine voice could muster.

Ryder turned to the glass cage on her desk. It had two levels with ladders and bridges and a small shelter on the second level. The creature that peeked out of the shelter looked something like an Earth hamster, but just slightly different enough to not be confused for one. "This is Cole. He snuck on board the ship looking for food and safety. Can't really begrudge him that."

Cole pressed up against the glass, fascinated by the new person. LJ watched him for a second, then swung out with Nico. Cole scampered inside his small house. Ryder just barely caught LJ's hand in time and pulled it back. "No, LJ," Ryder said. "You don't want to hurt him. Now he's scared of you. We have another pet around here. A pyjack named Deacon. We've been doing a lot of construction so he's been in hiding."

"He's currently in the armory," Sam said.

"We can find him later. And I don't want you scaring him either," Ryder said. "The rest of the crew are excited to meet you."

As the family left their quarters, the first person Ryder spotted was Drack in the galley fussing over something that smelled delicious. He looked up at the three of them. Subtler Krogan facial expressions were always pretty difficult to read and Drack's were no different. If it wasn't for all the work he had put into getting the Tempest into shape for LJ, she would have been concerned about his approval. As it was, he put the knife down and turned to face them.

Ryder moved closer. "LJ, this is Drack-"

Then the screaming started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter actually ended up being way longer than I thought it would. I mean, it was reaching 5000 words and I thought this would be an excellent place to split it in half.
> 
> But this also means that the next chapter will not take a month (and a half? Jeez, sorry again!)
> 
> You can find out wtf I'm up to at my hodgepodge of a [Tumblr](https://midnightswaltz.tumblr.com/).


	5. Ship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You'll be handed 'round the room  
> Like a puppy at a primary school"  
> \- Tim Minchin

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note to Self: Make no promises when your work office is in the process of moving. Not helped when I realized towards the end that one scene needed to be nearly scrapped and rewritten because I just could not get it to work. It works now, yay!
> 
> Also, thank you, thank you, thank you for all the comments and kudos. This story got more attention and love than I was expecting really. If you left a comment or a kudos imagine baby Rapunzel watching the lights from her window - that was my face.

LJ had taken one look at Drack and began wailing her head off. Nico dropped from her hands as she gripped her little arms around Ryder's neck and buried her face in her hair. Ryder ignored the ringing in her left ear and stroked her daughter's back, shushing her and rocking her. Jaal was immediately there with a calming field surrounding them and his hand on LJ's arm.

"Precious One, Drack is a very good man," Jaal spoke in a soothing voice. "He's not going to hurt you."

"Yeah, Little Bit, he's not nearly as scary as he looks," Ryder promised.

"Speak for yourself," Drack laughed. Ryder flashed him a look she hoped he understood as 'you're not helping'. "Shoulda seen that coming," Drack said as LJ's crying waned. Though LJ stubbornly turned her back to Drack whenever Ryder tried to spin her around.

Drack cut off a bit of the slab of roast he had been preparing and held it out to LJ.

"Yeah, that's not going to work for a person who's only _just_ beginning to get the idea of teeth."

Drack glanced at the floor and picked up Nico. The stuffed cat dwarfed in the Krogan's fingers. Gentler than Ryder had ever seen him be, Drack tapped LJ on the back with Nico. "Hey, kid, you dropped this." LJ twitched, but still refused to look at him. That did not dissuade Drack in the slightest. He just kept tapping her lightly on her back, then arm, then neck.

When he had Nico peek over her shoulder, LJ's face began to turn. Her cheeks were still bright red and she still clung one arm tight to Ryder, but she watched Nico retreat. When he saw he had her attention, Drack held Nico out in his hand. LJ stared for a minute, then ever so slowly reached out her hand and grasped it. It took a couple attempts. Drack waited patiently for her to finally get her little, uncoordinated fingers around Nico and pull him to her chest.

She didn't look entirely placated, she still laid her head on Ryder's shoulder and hid half her face, but she wasn't hiding all of it.

"Sorry, Drack. She'll warm up to you," Ryder rubbed her daughter's back.

"I'm not worried about it," he replied. "This is a face that takes some getting used to."

The galley door opened, revealing Lexi. "Everything all right?"

Ryder switched gears. "Yeah. LJ just had a bit of a shock. LJ, this is Dr. T'Perro."

LJ didn't cry, but she hid her face in Ryder's hair.

Lexi leaned in, just a little, to be eye level with LJ. "Hello, LJ. It's nice to meet you. It's my job to make sure you and your family stay healthy. Do you want to come see where I work?"

Ryder was fairly sure if LJ had understood any of that the answer would have been "no". "Harry checked her out barely a few hours ago, Lexi."

Lexi turned back to Ryder. "Just a scan or two. Cryo can be traumatic for adults, I would like to keep a close eye on her for a few days."

Ryder glanced at Jaal. He grimaced a little, but she knew he wouldn't argue. His aversion to illness did not extend to those he loved. So they said goodbye to Drack and followed Lexi down the short hall to the Med Bay.

"It's okay, Little Bit," Ryder whispered as the doors opened. "She gets a little single-minded, but she means well."

"Hop up on the bed, you can hold onto her while I run my scans."

Ryder settled onto the bed with LJ. Jaal behind Ryder making faces and playing keep away with Nico. Shortly after LJ was laughing again, no longer hiding. Shortly after that, Jaal climbed up on the bed with LJ in his arms. It was the only way they could keep LJ still enough for Lexi's scans. Which, at least, gave Ryder a chance to send a message to the research outpost at Palaav about Jaal's family using the QEC.

While working, Lexi asked about six million questions, mostly about how LJ responded to Jaal's bioelectricity. Jaal asked a few thousand of his own, too. He scowled and his voice shook as he asked if his bioelectricity could hurt her, even accidentally. Lexi assured them that Jaal's baseline was harmless even to one so young as LJ.

"I am also curious," Jaal's eyes flicked over Ryder quickly, then back to their daughter who was trying to hide Nico in his rofjinn. "Is she going to have biotics?"

"My scans do show eezo nodes throughout her nervous system and she hasn't developed any signs of illness, so my guess is 'maybe'," Lexi said. "It'll be a few years before we will know for sure."

Jaal nodded, stroking LJ's head, lost in thought. A tight knot lodged behind Ryder's heart. Doubts crept up over her shoulder. Jaal had always been fascinated by biotics before, it never occurred to her he might not be now.

"Jaal?" she worked hard to keep her voice even. "Is this going to be a problem?"

He reared back, pulling LJ closer to himself. "What?"

"LJ. Biotics. Are you worried she won't be biotic or that she will be?"

"Neither. Both." Jaal shook his head. "I am… excited about the possibilities. But I am also worried about what she will have to go through. The training. Receiving her an implant. Feeling different. I know it was difficult for you."

"Jaal," Lexi cut in. "Things are already much better for human biotics than they were even when Ryder was younger."

"When my biotics were discovered, there was still so much we didn't understand about it. That won't be the case for LJ. If she turns out to be biotic, which is still not guaranteed, she'll have a much easier time with it. And she'll have me, and Jonathan, and probably Cora to help her understand." Ryder took one of Jaal's hands. "And she'll have you."

He squeezed Ryder's fingers and gave her a soft smile. "Yes, she will. And she's strong, just like her mother."

"And like her dad." Ryder pressed her forehead to his, laying her free hand on his brow, near his temple. LJ laughed as Jaal's current lightly hopped. Happiness.

"Not to ruin such a lovely moment, but the scans are finished," Lexi tapped something on her omni-tool. "Everything looks okay. Don't be surprised if she is eating and sleeping more than normal for the next few days. That happened to the other minors removed from cryo. It's nothing to worry about. She'll be back to her pre-cryo schedule pretty quickly."

"Thanks, Lexi." 

"No problem. I think the rest of the crew are hovering nearby dying to meet her."

Ryder sighed. "Can't have that. Let's go put them out of their misery."

Jaal hopped off the bed and hoisted LJ up in his arms. LJ slobbered on Nico. "Where to next, hmm, Precious One? On this tour of your new home?"

The crew usually congregated in two areas - the cargo bay and the Research room. The Research Room above them was silent. It wasn't too hard to hear commotion in the cargo bay.

Sure enough, Liam and Jonathan were sparring, while Cora coached and Peebee jeered. Gil, Vetra, and Suvi had set up some boxes and were playing poker. The minute Ryder, Jaal, and LJ appeared the sparring stopped, cards scattered, and seven people trotted over. Jonathan first, not bothering to put on a shirt. He held his arms out to LJ who didn't protest when Jaal passed her over.

Jonathan gave her several kisses on her temple and cheeks, LJ grabbed his nose and didn't let go.

"Wow," Peebee said. "She's kinda funny lookin'." Coming from anyone else, Ryder might have been offended, but it was Peebee who flashed wide eyes at Ryder and began backpedaling. "I mean in a cute way. She's cute. But she kinda makes me want to laugh."

"She probably thinks you're funny looking, too," Jaal said. 

"Aw, thanks, kid," Peebee leaned in and ruffled LJ's hair. LJ used her free hand and reach for Peebee's crest. Peebee dodged. "Nu-uh, kid. No grabbing people. Ooh, this is nice, I get to call someone 'kid' for a change. I'm starting to see why Drack does it all the time."

"Everyone in this room is younger than you," Cora pointed out. "By a lot."

"But not for an Asari," Peebee said. "If you were Asari you'd all be, like, her age."

"I think I'll have to check with Lexi on that," Ryder said.

Jonathan finally extracted his nose from his niece's grip. "Ah, _there's_ my favorite person in the whole universe! Are you done with all that sleeping?" 

"I'll be sure to let Reyes know he's got competition the next time we talk."

"He'll understand," Jonathan adjusted LJ. "Or he wouldn't be my second favorite."

Ryder pressed her hand to her heart and flashed a very fake hurt expression. "You mean, I, your twin, the person who's been with you through every skinned knee and heartbreak. Who knows where all the bodies are buried is your _third_ favorite?"

He shrugged and smirked. "Meh. Sixth. _Maybe_ fifth."

Ryder dropped her hands. "Well, at least I'm in your top ten."

Suvi hovered at Jonathan's elbow and held out a hand to LJ. "Look at you, wean." LJ grabbed one of Suvi's fingers and tugged on it. "Can I hold her?"

" _I_ don't mind," Ryder said. "You might have to fight Jonathan for her."

Jonathan shifted LJ to a hip, lifted a newly freed arm. "Arm wrestle you for her."

Suvi rolled her eyes and waved her hands. "Jonathan hand her over." Jonathan sighed, very dramatically, and did as instructed. 

"Oh, you are a wee one, aren't you," Suvi shook her hair over LJ's crown, tickling her face. LJ giggled. "Are you liking your new home so far? I mean, I suppose you haven't seen much of it yet. The Tempest or the Cluster. There's a whole universe out there. It's big and sometimes scary. But don't let it fool you. It's amazing, too. Your mum n' da' and Aunt Suvi, and, well, all of us, we'll help you figure it all out."

"Suvi..." An unexpected lump of warmth lodged itself in Ryder's throat. Jaal slipped his arm around her waist. 

"Well, it's true," Suvi's cheeks turned bright red.

"Yeah, kid," Vetra said, leaning over Suvi's shoulder. "We've got your back."

LJ recoiled from Vetra, curling into her new auntie's embrace, Nico close to her chest. For a second it looked like there might be more tears. "Oh," Suvi bit her bottom lip and glanced up at Ryder, eyes wide.

Jonathan put a hand on his niece's arm before Ryder could intervene. "Be nice to your Aunt Vetra. She worked really hard to get you that nice crib and everything."

"You knew about that? And didn't tell me?" Before she finished the question, Ryder realized how stupid it was.

"That would ruin the surprise, Sis," he said, his tone dryer than Elaadan. "We stashed it behind Liam's couch while you were yelling at Addison over the comms." 

"The _third_ time," Peebee offered.

After a minute's deliberation, LJ held out Nico and tapped Vetra's arm with it. Suvi sighed in relief. No tears this time.

"Is that a good sign?" Vetra asked. 

"It's how she shows off her toys," Ryder said. "She wants to share."

"Oh, okay." LJ kept tapping Vetra with Nico. "Yes, it's a nice toy." Then LJ held out her arms. Vetra only hesitated for a second, before picking LJ up. LJ waffled a bit and looked a little dizzy from Turian shoulder height, but she settled and started babbling to Vetra, waving Nico around. After a second, Vetra began chatting back to LJ. She really was a natural.

"You know, when my sister was this small I was too little to pick her up," Vetra said. "It's kind of strange. But I get the appeal."

"She's bigger than I expected," Liam said.

"You should've seen her when she came out, she was barely big enough to fill out your shoe," Ryder said.

"She's still squishy," Peebee said, poking LJ's foot. LJ kicked out in response but Peebee dodged. "Good reflexes, though."

"And a grip you wouldn't believe," Jonathan rubbed his nose.

"Did we hear her crying earlier?" Cora asked. "We went to check, but Lexi said she'd take care of it."

"Yeah, LJ was not a fan of Drack's face."

Liam laughed. "Who is?"

"Shut up," Ryder said, with no real venom. "Lots of people are relieved to see his face. She's never met a Krogan before. She'll come around." Ryder really hoped she would. Drack could deny it all he wanted, but he was a marshmallow. And LJ had a ton of aunts and uncles, she was really going to need a grandpa.

"Hey, Vetra, can I have a turn?" Gil asked.

"I dunno," she teased, looking directly at LJ. "What do you say? Want to see your Uncle Gil?"

LJ just looked at Vetra.

"That's not a 'no'," Gil pointed out.

"Fine." Vetra passed the baby to him. LJ only made one brief noise of protest.

"Oof," Gil hefted her a bit, getting her settled in his grip. "Heavier than I was expecting."

"Please do not drop my daughter," Ryder said. "I'd hate to have to train up a new mechanic."

"Your mummy is so silly," he said. "Like she could replace me. Oops." He dropped his arms just enough to give LJ a swooping sensation and Ryder almost a heart attack. LJ squealed, the short drop a thrill. He did it a few more times, making LJ laugh and Ryder hide behind her hands reminding herself that he was a smart, strong guy and he would not actually drop LJ.

"Gil, you make her throw up you get to clean it up," Ryder said.

Gil made a face at that. "Fair point," and he stopped. LJ still grinning. Nico had fallen from her hands again, but Jonathan quickly retrieved him from the floor. He started tapping LJ on the nose with the toy, she cackled. Ryder smiled, Apparently, once she learned how to laugh, LJ couldn't stop. There were worse things than her kid laughing all the time.

"Almost makes me wish I had taken Jill up on her offer," Gil said. 

"I don't think Jill would have let you cart your kid off on the Tempest."

"Good thing, too," Cora laughed. "We might have had to open a daycare center on board."

"I said 'almost'," he insisted. "I'm still not ready for 'dad'. Think I can pull off 'uncle', though."

After a few more minutes of talking to her and playing with Nico, Gil passed LJ to Liam who tickled her stomach and got a laugh and a sharp baby heel to the side for it. Cora declined to hold her, but tussled her hair while Liam baby talked to her. Ryder noted that, despite her enthusiastic babbling to Liam, her daughter's laughter was waning. Eventually, LJ turned to Ryder and held out a hand. Ryder hadn't even finished settling her daughter in her arms before LJ's head was on her shoulder.

"Uh, oh," Liam said. "It looks like someone might've gotten too much excitement today."

"Yeah, lots of new faces in a couple hours time," Ryder rubbed her daughter's back.

"Lexi did say she would be more tired than normal for a while," Jaal pointed out.

"I hope she's awake enough when your family's call comes through," Ryder said.

"It will be all right if she's not," Jaal said. "They will understand."

"Um, Ryder," Kallo's voice sounded over the intercom. "Could you come to the bridge, please? We have a visitor."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm trying to keep things to between 2k and 3k words, so I ended up stopping the chapter earlier than expected. 
> 
> There will be more Drack and LJ in the next chapter, I'm not gonna leave it like that, but it might be a few weeks. As mentioned, my work office is moving, and work is where I do the bulk of writing.
> 
> You can find me on my [Tumblr](https://midnightswaltz.tumblr.com/) among a lot of random posts.


	6. New

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> LJ meets some new people, and bonds with one very old person

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, January has been kind of A Time for me energy wise, but here we are and here is the latest chapter. I failed at keeping this under 3000 words, primarily because I promised more LJ and Drack and the scene was already written. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it!
> 
> Angaran vocabulary are from the [ Angaran Expansion Project](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1458790) by MyrddinDerwydd (they can also be found on [Tumblr](https://angaranexpansionproject.tumblr.com/)).
> 
>  _Mysen_ = true mother  
>  _Mysentev_ = other mother, other mothers; lit. mother also

Ryder told Kallo she was on her way and handed the drowsy LJ to Jaal. The baby cried out as she was being jostled around until she felt her father's hands. Then their daughter settled and curled up under his chin. Jaal's arms around her supporting and protecting, Ryder's heart twisted again. She gave both of them a peck on the cheek and headed up the ladder.

The doors to the bridge opened, revealing the view of Meridian's port. And more importantly, Meridian. A whole world clinging to the inside shell of a sphere. The powerful core hanging in midair providing both energy and a day/night schedule. Their first night in Meridian had been a shock. Everyone had expected the light in the sky to remain steady, but as with all things, Meridian was a marvel. After several hours the light began to change, fading into orange and reddish colors until after another hour it had gone entirely. Various sized globes of bioluminescence floated providing a faint light, almost reminiscent of a moon and stars. 

Fourteen hours after that, the process reversed. At present, it appeared that the cycle was sixteen hours of daylight and fourteen of night. Only time would tell if that changed. Perhaps to adjust for some seasonal changes. The science teams theorized it was probably the same cycle on the Jardaan's homeworld, wherever that was. One way they carried it with them.

Still, even with all the wonder of this place, Ryder couldn't wait until they got airborne. She was going to show LJ the whole Cluster from here. 

At the moment, Ryder's view was blocked by the Tempest's pilot, Kallo Jaffe, and a very disheveled Reyes Vidal. His clothes were dirty and singed in places and he smelled faintly of medi-gel. Even his hair looked like it had been somewhat tidied with fingers and not an actual comb. He had looked better after a dozen disgruntled smugglers had spent 10 minutes shooting at him.

"Reyes! What the hell? Are you okay? What happened?"

Reyes' eyebrows were deeply furrowed. "Did I hear a baby crying?" 

Ryder held up a finger. "Explain…" she gestured to all of him, "this first, then we can get to that. Are you okay?"

"Why, Ryder, are you worried about me?" His fingers combed through his hair, he face twisted into a grimace when they caught on something. Pulling them out took a few seconds longer than it probably should have. She crossed her arms and scowled at him. Reyes sighed, holding his hands up, palms out. "I'm fine. Just a little singed. Promise. I was hoping you could give me a ride."

"Did something happen on Kadara? Is the port okay?"

"The Port's fine. I'm trying to keep it that way."

Ryder's scowl deepened. Despite all the murkiness that had happened between them, she still liked Reyes, even considered him a friend, but he was still so damn infuriating sometimes. "That gets us back to 'what the hell happened?'"

He sighed. Reyes' posture shifted. He stood a little taller, stiffer. He didn't bother to hide the shrewed glint in his dark eyes. 

Reyes was good at the friendly, suave outlaw. It was disarming to most people. _That_ Reyes may be duplicitous, but he wasn't the sort to involve himself in politics or design and execute an overthrow of an militaristic regime, no matter how small a regime it was.

But there was another side. Probably a more real side. One that was determined and cunning and a little scary to some people.

Right then, standing on her bridge, he was the Reyes Vidal that set up Sloane Kelly to die. Ryder should probably be actually afraid of him, but she couldn't manage it. Sneaky, underhanded, traitorous, slimy. She had heard him described as those and worse. But at heart, he was simply pragmatic. If you were a threat to him and his there was a bullet headed your way and you would never see it coming. She understood sometimes needs must. It wasn't like her hands were that clean, even before she did nothing to save Sloane. 

And while, yes, her being alive was more advantageous to him on numerous fronts; politically, professionally, and personally. She didn't doubt that he was as fond of her as she was of him. And he probably guessed that she could be just as scary.

"I need a ride to Aya. One of my listening posts picked up some chatter about some Kett movements. Something odd's going on in an area of the Scourge there's not supposed to be anything. I sent a coded message to Voeld. The commander there said the big guy wanted me to give him my report in person. _In person_." He slapped his pants. Clouds of dust puffed out and floated to the deck. "Aliens on Aya now. I won't stand out so he asks for a face to face? I blame you."

"However will I survive the shame?" she replied dryly.

"Got attacked a day out from Kadara. Outlaws. Escaped, barely. A nice Angaran researcher headed this way found my ship adrift and gave me a lift."

The longer he spoke, the more her stomach fell. "Oddly coincidental they Outlaws attacking you on the way out of port."

He shook his head. "I checked in with Keema. No issues. Well, no new ones. My guess is they were just desperate and didn't realize until it was too late that I didn't have any supplies worth dying over. I'm worried more about the Kett."

"You think they may be trying to get Kadara back?"

"I think they can try. It's a good position to strike at Meridian and Voeld. Maybe even Elaaden. And despite the Initiative's presence, we're clearly the black sheep of the Cluster. On the outside, without Sloane, we probably look like easy pickings."

Ryder sighed. "We were headed in Aya's direction anyway. No reason not to swing by. I want Lexi to give you a once over before we get underway. And we can probably get you some new clothes, too. At least some clean ones."

"Nothing too 'Initiative'," he insisted. "I have some taste."

"I'm sure Vetra can find you something," Ryder said. "Or Jonathan."

Reyes perked up. "Johnny said he was cleared."

Ryder smirked. "Yes, you and my baby brother can make out in the back seat on the way to the drive-in."

"Setting course for Aya?" Kallo asked.

"Yes." She wrapped her arm around his thin Salarian arm before he could turn back to his chair. "After you meet LJ."

Kallo shuffled. "Oh, I - uh - I'm needed on the bridge."

She put her other arm around Reyes' elbow. "We're in port, Kallo. Ship's not going anywhere at the moment. Let's go."

Kallo pulled back. "I've never met one before - a baby. What if…what if she doesn't like me?" 

"'A _baby_?" Reyes eyes widened. "I knew I heard-"

"Yes, yes, yes. We were getting to that," Ryder tugged him towards the door. "She's already screamed her head off at Drack. If she does the same to you, you'll be in good company. Let's go. You, too, Reyes."

He rubbed his hands together like some ridiculous Machiavellian cliche. "Oh, I wouldn't miss this."

***

By the time the three of them had arrived in the cargo bay, most everyone had wandered off back to their work. Jonathan and Jaal were sitting on some crates discussing some of the adjustments Jonathan was making to his flack cannon. The conversation stopped the second Reyes' feet his the bottom of the ladder. Jonathan set on him immediately, looking over his torn and dirty clothes with a stiff jaw and a frown and eyes that looked like he was plotting murder.

"I'm fine, Johnny," Reyes raised is hands in surrender. "I promise. Just a small dust up with some Outlaws. Your sister's already chastised me throughly."

"He needs a lift to Aya and we were heading that way anyway," Ryder said.

"So not a social visit?" Jonathan asked, checking out Reyes' cuts and bruises and burnt hair with his hands.

"Seeing you is a bonus." Reyes kissed him. Jonathan's hands stilled. 

Kallo glanced at the little LJ in Jaal's arms. "Hello, LJ," he said. "I'm Kallo." LJ just stared at him, probably too tired to really register him. Kallo reached a hand out, but hesitated. He glanced at Jaal who nodded encouragingly, only then did he pat her on the back gently. "Okay, you're pretty cute."

"And who is this little one?" Reyes asked after leaving Jonathan with a dazed look.

Ryder laughed at her brother's face. He rolled his eyes and pulled Reyes closer to Jaal. Jaal frowned but didn't pull away. He was never going to be fond of Reyes, but he put up with him for Ryder and Jonathan's sakes. "Reyes, I'd like you to meet the newest member of the Pathfinder Team, Ellen Joanne Ryder. LJ to her friends."

Reyes raised an eyebrow. "I know the requirements to join the Pathfinder Team are loose but I thought you'd have to be out of diapers first." He looked a little closer and tapped her hand. LJ immediately wrapped her own hand around his finger. "Where did she come from?"

"Cryo," Ryder said.

Reyes narrowed his eyes. "She lose her parents?"

" _We_ are her parents," Jaal said.

Reyes looked up at him and backed away as much as he could with LJ's firm grip on his finger. "I meant her biological parents."

"Seriously? Look at her," Jonathan said. "What part of her doesn't look exactly like my sister?"

Reyes stared at him, blinking and silent. His eyes swiveled to Ryder. " _You_ had a baby back in the Milky Way? And the Initiative had no idea?"

Ryder nodded. "At least no one in the current leadership did. I don't know if dad told anyone else but I doubt it. And Jonathan and I sure didn't. Dad was insistent it be kept quiet."

"It's not going to be quiet now," Reyes said. "You know that."

Jonathan snorted. "I'm surprised you didn't already hear in port. I'm pretty sure her arguments with Tann and Addison over getting her out of cryo could be heard all the way to Kadara."

Reyes shook his head and laughed. "This is just… Sorry, Evah, I can't quite picture you as a mom."

"Neither could I," she admitted, stroking LJ's hair, "but here we are. And we're doing all right."

***

Ryder and Jaal set up in the Meeting Room to wait for the call from Havarl. Reyes had been carted off by Jonathan to get checked out by Lexi, followed by snack, a shower, and some clothes. She didn't care which part of that they were working on at the moment. There was a much more interesting scene right in front of her.

LJ dozed on her father's chest. Her little nose snoring faintly. Jaal rubbed her back barely daring to breath in case that would disturb her. Ryder couldn't hide the massive, dopey smile on her face as she watched them.

"You're staring, Darling One."

"With such a nice view, can you blame me?" 

His eyes swiveled to the side and the corner of his mouth quirked up. "I suppose not."

Ryder shifted in her seat. A question had been forming in the back of her mind ever since Reyes had met LJ. "Jaal, can I…I was wondering something." 

"Hmm?"

"Jonathan introduced her to Reyes as 'Ryder' and I was thinking... in most human traditions the children take their father's family name. I mean, it's much more common these days for kids to keep their mom's name, or for the parents to have made a new name, like a hyphenate. Those can get kind of complicated or ridiculous, but they can also be kind of nice…" Jaal's eyebrow raised. Ryder took a deep breath. "Anyway, she has you now and I was wondering…"

"You want to know if she should have my family's name?"

"Um…well, I was wondering what the Angaran tradition is. What do _you_ expect?"

"I would never take away a name that comes from her family. And 'Ryder' is a very important name these days."

"You're her family, too, though. How do Angara choose? Like when two marry and combine their family do both keep their original family name?"

"Often they create a new name for the new union. One that honors both families."

"I like that," Ryder said. "Combining human family names we'd be something like Ama Darav-Ryder."

Jaal hummed. "Ellen Joanne Ama Darav Ryder," he slowly picked his way over the name. "That is… very long."

Ryder chuckled. "Yeah, it's a mouthful."

"What about 'Damaryder'?"

She couldn't stop the way her nose scrunched up. "I'm vetoing that one."

Jaal thought. "Perhaps…"

The panel beeped. "You have a call waiting from Havarl," Sam chimed in.

"Perhaps we keep thinking on it." Jaal lifted himself from the couch. LJ continued to snore with barely an interruption. He approached the center desk and pushed the button on the panel. There was a brief buzzing and a very faint flash of light, then Sahuna Ama Darav appeared in the space to his left. The projector turned her an unnatural blue color and Ryder could see the furniture through her.

"Jaal!" Sahuna's smile split her face. "It is good to see you."

"And you, my mother."

Her smile faded somewhat as her brows knitted together. "What are you holding?" She leaned in. Jaal shifted to give her a better view and her eyes flew wide. " _Who_ are you holding?"

"Mysen, this is Ellen Joanne. LJ. Your new granddaughter."

Sahuna wheeled back, almost falling out of the range of the receiver. A familiar green hand steadied her and a familiar matching face appeared over her shoulder.

"What is this?" Sahuna's spouse, Liraan, demanded. "You said 'granddaughter'? Who's daughter?"

"Yes, mysentev. Mine and Ryder's."

Sahuna had begun to recover from her shock. She leaned forward again, closer, as if she could reach through the trillions of miles and touch her. "You have a child? Finally?" 

Ryder giggled at Jaal's grimace. Liraan's head turned in Ryder's direction. Even knowing that Jaal's stepmother couldn't see her through the QEC, Ryder winced. "I heard that, Evelyn."

Ryder stepped up next to Jaal where the receiver would register her.

"This is true?" Liraan asked both of them. "You have a child?"

"Yup," Ryder said.

"It's true," Jaal said. "I wouldn't joke about this."

Both of the Angaran women stared in silence. Their smiles growing larger and larger. "We have a new grandchild!" Sahuna cheered. From out of the viewer were several smaller cheers and a few shouts of congratulations that were distinctly not Angaran voices.

LJ began to twitch in Jaal's arms, making little sounds of annoyance. Sahuna looked slightly chagrined at that, but only briefly. LJ stretched under Jaal's chin, rubbing her eye with her fist.

"Uh oh," Ryder said. "Someone's done with her nap."

"Where did she come from?" Sahuna asked, a new lightness in her voice. "She's human, yes? Your doctor's letters were very informative. You haven't been pregnant this whole time."

Ryder and Jaal nodded. "She is human," Jaal said.

"She's…um, well…" Butterflies had exploded in her stomach again. She adored Sahuna and Liraan and she had been keeping this from them as much as anyone. "Well, I had her in the Milky Way."

"'Had her'?" Liraan questioned. "That means you gave birth to her?"

"Yes."

"And you said nothing to anyone?" Sahuna asked.

Ryder shook her head. "I had to leave her in cryo. It was…painful to be separated from her for so long."

Sahuna frowned, but her eyes didn't hold any criticism or disappointment. "I understand. But she is with you now."

Ryder wrapped a hand around her daughter's. "Yes, she is."

Liraan cocked her head. "When did you get to retrieve her from stasis?"

"This morning," Jaal replied, shifting LJ as she squirmed in his arms. "Would like to see your grandmothers, Precious One?"

LJ turned to look at Sahuna. She babbled and reached out a hand, but only found air. She looked up at Jaal, her face beginning to scrunch together. Jaal shushed and rocked her. "It's all right, you will get to hold her soon."

Jaal's true mother leaned in again. "You have your mother's eyes. They are very pretty and keen." Sahuna stood up again, looking both of them in the eyes. "You are bringing her to Havarl? To meet the us?"

"Yes, of course," Jaal said.

"We're leaving in the morning and have to make a stop at Aya first," Ryder interjected. Knowing Liraan, she was already calculating how long the trip was from Meridian to Havarl and there would be questions if they were not prompt. "It shouldn't be more than a day stopover, though."

"How old is 'Elleeen Joe Anne'?" someone asked off the receiver. It sounded kind of like Kona.

That was a tricky question even in the Milky Way. Also, Angarans didn't exactly have a concept of a month. The closest to it would be a season, which still varied by planet. "LJ's about a season old on Havarl, I think," Ryder said. "She's 196 Earth days old."

"Is that young for a human?" Liraan asked.

"Very," Ryder replied. "She just learned to turn over and sleep regular hours not long before we left."

"But she is healthy?" Sahuna asked.

"Yes," Jaal said. "And very strong. And she laughs very often."

"Healthy, strong, and happy. Good," Sahuna nodded. "Welcome to the Cluster, Little One. And welcome to our family."

***

Ryder twitched as a small soap bubble popped in front of her eye. LJ cackled, slapping the sink of water with both her hands. She was half submerged in the galley's sink, the only sink big enough to bathe her in. A waterproof cushion was keeping her upright and away from the hard metal side of the basin. 

Dinner had been eaten and cleaned up an hour ago. It had been an even louder affair than usual with two extra people at the table, even if one did spend half of it asleep on Ryder's shoulder. Drack produced a large spread of roasted elmok and vegetables. LJ didn't scream when he appeared, but she did hide her face in Ryder's hair. That seemed to be only a slight improvement. Drack didn't show any signs of being bothered by this, but it made Ryder's heart drop all the same. Especially when he produced a warm bottle for LJ. 

"Figured she'd be hungry after her nap," he had said, settling into the bench next to her. "Sam told me how to make food for her."

"You asked Sam?" Ryder raised an eyebrow, taking the bottle from him. LJ latched on immediately.

"Voluntarily?" Jaal asked.

"What of it? Everybody else was busy." Drack shrugged and turned to putting together his own plate. LJ was quiet throughout the rest of dinner. She didn't even flinch when Drack had to hold her bottle instead of Jaal so Ryder could eat some of her own food.

After the galley was cleaned seemed like the best time to give LJ her first bath in Heleus.

Jaal laughed with the baby. He had changed out of his armor and was content with how wet his shirt was getting. "She likes the water."

"Who doesn't?" Ryder watched LJ splash in the sink. "When we were little, we'd go visit family on Earth, we always went somewhere with a beach. Mom and Aunt Gwen _loved_ the ocean. No idea where it came from. Their parents weren't sailors or anything."

"And you?"

"And me. And Jonathan. Even d-," Ryder laughed. "I should pull some pictures of my dad in swim trunks. Maybe that'll stop everyone from looking so surprised when I don't act in awe of him. 'He's your hero? Here let me show you this picture of him wearing Micky Mouse shorts at the beach.'" 

"You believe people would like him _less_ if you showed him being… silly?"

"Everyone remembers him as this big, tough N7. Explorer. Hero. They're always surprised when I'm not as impressed with him as they are." What would he have thought about bringing LJ on the Tempest? The plan had been for Ryder to keep her in cryo for maybe up to a year as she worked as a scout. Once they were settled, Ryder would move into research and LJ would be with her. Even while planning it in the Milky Way, they knew that would be the best case scenario. The scenario they'd ended up with was far outside of anything they had considered. If she had _dared_ to even ask the question of the possibility of getting LJ from cryo, given the situation they had found themselves in, the explosion would have been apocalyptic.

A hand touched her lower back. "What's wrong?" Jaal asked.

Ryder shook her head. "Just thinking about my dad. What he would've thought about this." 

"He would not have approved?"

Ryder snorted. "That fight would have been bigger than any I've had with Addison. It doesn't matter anymore. He isn't here. And the people who are have been more interested in helping than avoiding."

The door opened. LJ's head turned on instinct and she froze. Her tiny fingers clenched and released in the water.

"Hey." Drack stepped around them and opened the fridge, pulling out a strange twisted root that looked kind of like licorice. LJ watched his every step, but went back to splashing in the sink when he leaned on the counter.

"Hey, Drack," Ryder smiled. She took LJ's hand and gave him a little wave. "LJ says 'hi', too."

"I'd offer some to ya'," he said to LJ and indicated the root, "but your mom says you don't have teeth yet."

"Also, it's gross," Ryder teased. Jaal nodded vehemently in agreement.

"Huh, more for me." He stood by the fridge munching on his snack while Ryder showed Jaal how to wash LJ's hair. Given how closely Jaal studied the bottle of baby shampoo, LJ would probably have her own special dad-made shampoo fairly soon. LJ squealed as he poured water over her head. She hit the water with her palms so hard some splashed out onto the counter and onto all three adults. Which only made her laugh harder. 

"Having a good time, aren't ya," Drack reached past Ryder and flicked some of the water back at LJ. LJ's smile slipped for the barest of seconds before returning full force. She splashed him right back. Drack returned the favor with a laugh of his own. Ryder moved behind Jaal, who was shaking with his own laughter. She slipped her arms around his waist and laid her head on his shoulder, watching Drack and her daughter play.

Water went everywhere as the two battled it out. Jaal refilled the sink at least once. When it looked like LJ's energy was waning, Drack gave a strange dramatic flourish and declared LJ a great warrior. In the end everyone was soaked and laughing. LJ insisted on Drack pulling her from the makeshift tub and drying her off. Between the two of them, Drack and Jaal got her dressed in a fresh diaper and clean pajamas. Ryder found enough towels to make sure the floor wasn't a death trap but decided to let evaporation take care of the rest.

The four of them settled around the galley table. Jaal wrapped an arm around Ryder as she leaned back against him. Drack cradled a dozing LJ in his artificial arm.

"I'm glad she's not scared of you anymore," Ryder admitted.

Drack shrugged. "Wouldn't be the first time. 'Sides, kids don't always like everyone immediately. And I do look like I could eat her in one bite."

"Well, yes, but you won't."

"Nah, humans are too stringy," he tickled LJ under her chin. "She's a good kid. You don't need to worry about that."

A lump formed in the back of Ryder's throat. "Thanks, Drack." Her voice wavered. "For everything."

"No problem," he said. "You're a pretty good kid, too."

***

The giant light over Port Meridian was steadily shifting from orange to yellow. Meridian's version of sunrise. Ryder stood on the bridge of the Tempest with LJ in her arms and Jaal at her back. Reyes and Jonathan stood behind Suvi. LJ babbled to Kallo, clutching Nico in her fingers. She didn't seem to mind that Kallo's responses were distracted as he finished up his flight check list.

"Check. We're ready to go on your say, Pathfinder."

"Let's go," she shifted LJ to a better position on her hip. "Places to go, people to give important intel to."

The Tempest's engines hummed and the ship lifted off the platform. There was a shifting underfoot as the internal dampeners lagged behind. LJ squeaked and ducked closer to her mother. She had been fast asleep during the one and only take off of her life.

Ryder tightened her grip. "S'ok, Little Bit. Mama's got you."

Kallo took the Tempest slower than Ryder had ever seen before. She raised an eyebrow at him.

"Just letting her get used to it," he said.

Ryder nodded. LJ continued to babble at Kallo, unaware of the wonders outside the window. In the distance, a familiar black spot on the sky. The one opening into Meridian. They hadn't quite figured out how to close it. There appeared to be some sort of field that allowed ships to pass through, but did not let all the heat and oxygen escape. At last count there were about twelve different science teams working on it.

Once the hole took up half the screen, Jaal leaned over and pointed it out to LJ. She looked up at him, then over at his arm, then followed where his singular finger pointed. Her head cocked to the side. Ryder could see her eyes widen in the screen's reflection. LJ buried her face in Ryder's shoulder.

Jaal rubbed LJ's back. "No, no. Don't be afraid, Precious One. The stars are amazing. And there's so many things to see."

Ryder gently coaxed her face back around just in time as they exited the sphere. "There you are."

LJ's eyes watched the shell move over head. Then turned her head forward. She reached a hand out, her fingers opened and closing as if she could catch the stars. LJ looked up at Ryder and Jaal with a big grin. She squirmed in Ryder's arms as if she could fly on her own already.

Ryder doubted LJ understood what was going on, but that was okay. She just saw the stars reflected in her daughter's eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One of my personal headcanons is that the Tempest is actually a bit larger than it appears in game. There's a couple extra beds in the crew bunks, the cargo area has enough room for a small gym, and the whole crew can actually fit in the galley.
> 
> You can find me on my [Tumblr](https://midnightswaltz.tumblr.com/) among a lot of random posts.


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